Post #4: Why do we complain?

Complaining... a.k.a whining?

Weren't we all supposed to learn in adolescence that whining got you no where, if not more trouble. Throwing a temper tantrum in the grocery store didn't end with you getting that toy; it usually resulted in a spanking, time out or the threat of getting left at the store. As children, we usually learn fairly early that whining is a lost cause.

Fast forward to adulthood, and no one ever describes anyone as a 'whiner', but could it be we have all gave the title a synonym of complainer? Let's go to my dear friend Merriam-Webster dictionary (can you tell how much I like them yet) to look at the definitions of both words.

'Complain' is:
- To say or write that you are unhappy, sick, uncomfortable, etc., or that you do not like something
- To say (something that expresses annoyance or unhappiness)
'Whine' is defined as:
- To complain in an annoying way
- To make a high, crying sound
- To make a high and unpleasant sound that continues for a long time

Depending on who you're talking to, your complaints can become whines-- even as adults. And that's not a good look for anyone; it's annoying!

Of course, we should all complain when deemed appropriate, such as getting bad service at a place of business or being mistreated in any situation. But I'd like to take a guess that most of us complain a lot about our own lives. We point the fingers at others, at situations, at circumstances but never look at ourselves.

Everyone knows that no one human being is perfect, and that the world is far from perfect, yet we tend to complain about not having perfect lives. Most of us feel money will make everything better, and wash away are problems.  Obviously, not true. Yes, becoming a billionaire would change a lot of things for the better, taking the headache of finances away for a while.  But since we're not perfect, every single one of us is searching for something more. Even the rich struggle with self-love, confidence, relationships, careers, trust, etc...

And what does subconscioulsy complaining about our lives get us? I'd say, absolutely nothing. Here's a favorite, most can relate to: 'I hate my job.' While that angst may motivate you to do a quick google search, and click a button called 'Apply Now,' it does nothing to get you to where you truly want to be in life. I challenge you to:
1) Recognize your greatness, and that others are in the same predicament; you're not alone
2) Realize how blessed you are to have a job
3) Say 'I want more out of this job or my career'
4) Come up with action steps to get yourself in a better situation (Along with applying, join professional groups to network with, go to community events where you can meet people in your ideal career, and reach out for mentors)

I believe 'hate' is such a strong word, no matter what the context, and I also believe words are powerful, especially the ones you speak about yourself and to yourself. 'Hate' tends to describe a horrible place/feeling that's hard to escape, and while your job hunt (or whatever struggle) may feel as such, you have to remind yourself that there's more to life than your current situation. Don't let your complaining to yourself about yourself confuse your goals and positivity. No one wants to be described by others as a professional whiner, or a constant complainer, so why become that to yourself?

Encourage yourself, and get to the root of your complaints; then change your actions and thoughts about yourself for the better.